


I wish I could cheer for you

by Nonani



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Cell Phones, Coming Out, Crying, Draco in muggle clothes, Everyone Is Gay, F/M, Fluff, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, M/M, Pining Draco Malfoy, Pining Harry Potter, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-War, Quidditch, Ron is a confused boy, Ron is a little shit, Slow Burn, Slurs, almost, figuring out sexuality, suicide mentioned, the f word
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-30
Packaged: 2019-02-23 17:40:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 15,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13195221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nonani/pseuds/Nonani
Summary: It begins with a normal quidditch game, continues on to an explosion of butterflies when Harry looked at the numbers scribbled on the small paper note, then everything come crashing down when the person he trusted the most wasn't like he thought. Will Harry be able to patch up his broken heart and what about the boy with the stormy grey eyes?This is originally posted on Fanfiction.net under my acc purpleMind





	1. Chapter 1

Harry watched the game lazily while hearing cheers all around him. It was a very nice day for quidditch and he, Ron and Hermione had decided to go watch the game just to pass some time. The sun was brightly shining, warming up everyone after a very long, cold winter. Loud cheers from the different houses filled the stadium, slytherins screaming their lungs off while the ravenclaws were a little quieter but still cheering for their team. The players flew by the audience in a speed like no other and people held up banners and signs that represented their team and house. After each and every goal the teams made the enthusiasm grew stronger and the cheers louder.

At the moment it stood 180-160 to slytherin and some of the ravenclaw players looked a little worried but still played on with fierce power. But to Harry, none of this mattered because he only had one thing on his mind. And it had silver hair and stormy grey eyes.

It had been like this for a few weeks now, always turning his head as soon the silverhaired boy appeared. Glancing at him when others didn't see. Having troubles sleeping because of the butterflies in his stomach. Smiling like an idiot whenever the boy did something Harry thought was cute, also quite often surprised that his sight on the boy had changed from annoying to adorable. Of course it hurt when Harry thought about him, he knew that they could never happen but still couldn't resist his feelings towards the slytherin. He just hoped he was subtle enough so people wouldn't notice.

How would that look like? The all mighty chosen one falling for the all time bully whose dad was associated with the darkest warlock the world had seen. Ha, fun time.

Harry furrowed his brows and leaned back with crossed arms. But he couldn't hold that face for long because it soon turned soft when he saw the silver haired boy swooshing by, chasing a small gold and shiny object. It didn't take long before the rest of the crowd noticed it too and started screaming even louder. The slytherins looked like they'd already won and the ravenclaws was biting their own and each others nails down.

Ravenclaw's seeker was now chasing the snitch too. Faster than ever, both seekers flew around the whole arena after the golden snitch that would end the game. Up, down, left and right. Sometimes it looked like they would fall off their brooms and the crowd gasped several times. Even the rest of the teams players had slowed down the game, watching the hunt in great suspense. Everyone knew that even if you got more points then the other team, catching the snitch meant winning and that's why the seekers always had to be at their best and highest peak.

Both Hermione and Ron had started leaning forward in great focus at the game and the seekers. Draco had been really close about five times now and yet hadn't caught it. The other seeker had been close too but always been pushed away by Draco and fallen behind. Even some of the teachers where focusing hard on the game and probably had an opinion on who they wanted to win.

Harry was watching every single move Draco made. Staring as in awe at the agile form making its way through the arena, chasing after the small sphere. Harry could not believe himself when he heard the thoughts running through his head. 'Handsome' 'Beatiful' 'Sexy...'. That last one making his face turn a shade redder then before. He looked around him to see if anyone noticed his sudden change of color but every single person was hooked at the game and wouldn't react even if someone hit them straight in the face.

Suddenly everyone gasped loudly and not a second later came the screaming. Harry was dumfounded. He was too caught up in staring at Draco that he missed the fact that he actually caught the golden snitch. He wanted to cheer, to stand up just like all the slytherins and scream. But he knew that he couldn't so he just smiled for himself while his friends where muttering about slytherin always winning and never giving the others a chance.

Draco had now landed at the ground and held up the golden snitch while smiling like crazy. A second later he was lifted up by the team while they cheered and whistled at him. Harry smiled and hid it behind his scarf, looking amused by the show. His friends got up from their seats and began their way back to the school. Harry sighed and rose from the hard bench. He stretched his back for a second and then looked down one more time at the boy he wished he could cheer for.

Just when Harry was about to turn and walk away, their eyes met and Harry couldn't resist looking into those stormy grey eyes he loved. Harry thought that maybe Draco would sneer at him or shout that he would always be better than him and then he would laugh at him with the other slytherins. But what happened next would be the reason for a whole week without sleep. Draco. The Draco Malfoy. Who always said mean stuff to Harry and treated him like dirt. That Draco Malfoy who picked at Harrys best friends for one being a muggle and one being poorer.

That Draco Malfoy just blinked at Harry. Not as in 'I got something in my eye' blinked but more like 'Hey you sexy piece of meat' blinked. He even smirked after that! And all Harry could do was to stand there with his mouth hanging open and his eyes so widely open that they would almost pop out. And Draco noticed this, it only made him more cocky and he blinked again and licked his lips. At this Harry was melting goo, not capable of anything except staring and growing another shade of red.

The team had let Draco down by now and they were all on their way back to to change and celebrate. Draco turned around but not without subtly sending a small piece of paper up to Harry. It landed on the bench and he was quick to get it before anyone else saw it. He opened the small note and saw a few numbers scribbled down on it. Immediately his heart started to beat faster he couldn't believe that he actually got Dracos number. He couldn't quite wrap his mind around the fact that Draco seemed to have a phone.

Harry was too caught up in his own world that he didn't notice one tiny thing.

Hermione had seen it all.

And she was quick to run up to Harry. She placed a hand on his shoulder and when he felt it Harry turned around. All the color drained from his once tomato shaded face and the look of pure excitement turned to fear and pleading. He was about to speak when Hermione stopped him.

"Don't. We go back right now and straight to your room. I want to hear it all and it's no use to deny this" she said and waved her hand in a circle at the last statement. I sighed and followed her back. This is gonna be a tuff evening. Who am I kidding... this is gonna be one hell of a week...


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't read all books so if there's something that doesn't add up quite as it should then please have mercy on me. Don't mean to offend anyone or the fandom.

Harrys heart was beating so fast he thought it was gonna explode. Hermoine had a firm grip on his wrist as she almost dragged him back to the school and up to Gryffindor tower. He knew that he wasn't gonna let her treat him like a child but he was actually a bit scared to how she would handle it all. Surely she wouldn't be very happy about him having a crush on the person most of the school didn't seem very fond of. And to add to the problem there was how Draco always treated not just Hermoine and Ron but Harry too. It was nerve wrecking.

Harry fiddled with the note in his pocket, the small note that had Draco's actual number written on it. Even though cellphones wasn't used that much here Harry was still feeling giddy about getting his number.

The memories flooded Harrys mind. He didn't know how many times it had played and replayed in his head by now but every time he saw Draco blink at him, Harry felt like he could burst of happiness. One thought had crossed his mind though, what if it all were just a prank. That Draco somehow had found out about Harrys feelings and decided to play a huge prank on him. If that was the truth then Harry would probably be crushed. Not just because he was being played but also because of the feelings Harry actually had about Draco.

It's like, when you fall in love with someone you change your way of seeing that person. You suddenly start thinking that they would never do anything to hurt you or anybody else. But that's not true, or logical at all. That's what scares Harry the most. The fact that Draco wouldn't care one single bit about Harry and just brutally crush him.

Harry shuddered at the thought and even felt some small unshed tears prickle his eyes. He quickly blinked them away and started to take in what was around him instead. He noticed that Hermoine was still holding her death grip on his wrist and they had reached the stairs that led up to the gryffindor common room and bedrooms. Harry gulped while trying his best to keep up with her speed. His heart started beating faster at the thought of Hermoine confronting him about what happened back at the arena.

He took deep breaths and just some minutes later they were standing in front of the painting that led into the common room. The lady in the painting looked at them and raised one eyebrow before she cleared her throat and asked for the password. Hermoine answered her quickly in a hushed tone and then proceeded to drag Harry with her.

They got some weird looks from the other gryffindor students when Hermoine swooshed by them and up the stairs to Harry and Rons shared bedroom. It then hit Harry, how would Ron react. Should Harry even tell him? Or would Hermoine do it without him having any say about it? He felt bad about not telling his best friend but he also didn't want Ron to hate him.

With no more time to think he was pushed into his room by Hermoine, not so hard that it hurt but actually pretty gentle. She then closed the door behind her but she didn't turn around yet. This made Harry even more uncomfortable, he wringed his hands together stood there stiff and waiting for her to say anything. He tried to slow down his heart and breathing because this was not the time to have a panic attack.

When Hermoine still didn't say anything he suddenly broke down a bit. Tears started to form in his eyes, the rolled down his cheeks in a slow and silent pace and Harry felt his breath hitch a little.  _'She's gonna yell at me, hate me and leave me alone isn't she? I knew she would be angry…'_ Harry thought while looking down to the floor.

Hermoine then sighed loudly, completely unaware of how Harry was breaking down.

"Harry listen-" She started but when she turned around to face him her eyes almost popped out. Harry was crying so much his cheeks were wet and red, his hands were balled together and his head hung low. He looked completely destroyed.

"Hey! Harry stop crying, please! It's okay!" Hermoine rushed to him and put her arms tightly around his waist. She rocked him back and forth while stroking his hair. Harry put his arms around her smaller shoulders and buried his face in the crook of Hermoines neck. He was still crying but his breathing had calmed down a bit.

"Ssshhh, calm down Harry I'm not gonna yell at you. Sit down on you bed okay?" She talked softly and pulled Harry to his bed and gently put him down. She sat beside him and stroked Harrys hair out of his face. She felt her heart clench when she saw his red eyes and tear striped face. _'I am so stupid, I should have said something sooner. Sure it was a lot to take in at first but I'm not mad at him. He must think I hate him'_ Hermoine gasped when she realized why Harry was crying so much and decided to tell him as fast as she could.

"Harry, I am not mad at you okay? I don't hate you at all, calm down. I was just surprised. Please don't cry anymore." She cooed softly and she sighed relieved when she felt his body relax and his crying stopped. Hermoine had never seen Harry cry, at least not like this. He had cried sometimes when he had had nightmares and such from him being linked to Voldemort. It had taken a toll on Harry himself and Ron and Hermoine too since seeing their best friend break down in fear isn't very pleasant. But now it was so different, he looked so vulnerable and broken that it sent Hermoine shivers over her body. Hermoine just wanted to shield him from the pain and sorrow he felt. She truly felt horrible about her reaction, she should have acted better and not make Harry think she loathed him.

"Harry look at me" Hermoine said but he didn't move, he only tensed up. "It's okay, please look at me. I'm not angry at you" She pleaded and put her hand on his tightly curled up fingers. He relaxed his hands and took a deep breath before looking at his best friend next to him. She smiled softly at him as to convince Harry that she wasn't angry.

He searched her eyes for any signs of lying but only found guilt and sincere love. That made Harry a bit happier and he felt the corners of his mouth twitch into a small smile. This made Hermoine sigh of small relief, he had at least stopped crying. She intertwined her hands with his and held them tight. Hermoine looked into his eyes and smiled at him.

"Harry, I'm not angry at all. I do not hate you or anything okay?" Hermoine raised her eyebrows and looked at him, he then nodded and used one of his hands to dry his wet cheeks. Harry felt so relieved and happy, he was so sure that Hermoine would hate him or be furious about his feelings towards Draco. Before he could think any further of it he heard Hermoine chuckle.

"What's so funny?" Harry now noticed how sore his throat felt and his voice came out broken and raspy. He cleared his throat before Hermoine spoke up.

"Not funny, more like surprising. I never thought that you would fall for Draco. I did suspect that you were gay but Draco? That was not what I expected." Harry sat dumbfounded at what Hermoine just had said. She lifted one eyebrow at him and smirked.

"Wait, how did you-" Harry said but Hermoine interrupted him mid sentence.

"Well it wasn't that hard actually, I noticed how you sometimes checked out guys in hogsmeade and how you never looked that interested when you heard about some girl crushing on you." Hermoine smiled at Harrys now very red face.

"Oh my god…. I expected this to be tough but not in this way!" Harry ducked his head and behind his hands. He felt the embarrassment burning red on his cheeks but even so, no matter how embarrassed he was right now he couldn't be happier.

He had been so sure that he would be yelled at, being told that he's insane for having a crush on not just a boy, but Draco Malfoy. And to make it even worse, when Hermoine just stood in front of the door and not even turning around to look at him it made his stomach churn and his heart sank to his feet. He was so scared of rejection from anyone because of his home situation. Always being treated like dirt and feeling no love from his surroundings made him fear rejection more than anything in the world.

Then he found out that he was a wizard and his world turned 180 degrees. He met Hagrid, Ron and Hermoine, he got a lot of new friends in a matter of only months.

Harry felt his shoulder shake again as a few lonely tears rolled downs his cheeks.

"Harry! Why are you crying again?!" Hermoine said in panic. Harry chuckled and wiped the tears away with the back of his hand. He looked up at Hermoine who had a very confused look on her face. He took her hand and squeezed it tightly.

"I'm crying because I'm so happy!" He simply said grinned from ear to ear. Hermoine calmed down at that and couldn't help the smile growing on her face. She was glad that he didn't cry anymore, well not of sadness at least. Then she remembered the reason he started crying in the first place and her grin turned to a smirk and her eyes glowed mischievously. Harry noticed this and his posture turned stiff while his eyes had a bit of fear in them.

"So, Draco huh?"

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like to mess with my characters, if you haven't noticed


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prepare yourselves

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for homophobic language

It was dinner time and after a long but necessary talk with Hermione, Harry could breath easier and he felt lighter. Hermione had been an angel about the whole situation and had even told Harry, in return, that she had a crush on Ron. Harry, of course, had been a bit surprised, but also happy because he knew Ron fancied Hermione as well. They had joked around a lot and Hermione had not let this chance to tease Harry go. Harry had lost count on how many times she had made him blush red as a tomato and it only made Hermione even cockier.

After walking together to the Great Hall, they entered the big room and saw that Ron was already sitting at their usual place at the Gryffindor table with their house. He noticed the two and waved with to them with a big grin on his face. Harry forced an anxious smile. He knew he had to tell Ron sooner or later. He was also very sure that Ron would catch up quickly and understand that something wasn't quite right.

He was deep in thought and only awoke from his own world when he felt someone poke his arm annoyingly. He had already sat down next to Ron and so he cleared his head and focused back on the real world. Ron was, as Harry predicted, quick to notice the weird behavior of his friend. Ron asked himself what it could be that bothered him, but decided to leave it for later as it seemed like it wasn't anything Harry wanted to talk about at the dinner table where everyone else could hear him. Stealing one last glance at Harry, he began to talk normally, pretending nothing was wrong. Harry smiled throughout dinner and talked along, although he knew what was coming. Even though he knew Hermione would make Ron understand, he still felt a gnawing feeling in his stomach.

Slowly but surely, dinner was soon over, and the students headed back to their respective towers. Harry, Hermione and Ron rose from their seats and started the walk back while talking casually with each other. Hermione sent Harry several calming looks, as to tell him that everything will go fine and she will stand by his side. Harry felt some reassurance from this and slowly calmed down. Ron was his best friend after all, he couldn't hate Harry for it. Though he probably won't particularly like it since it's not just anyone; this was THE Draco Malfoy.

Just thinking his name made Harry smile secretly. He knew that Draco had been a prick ever since they first started at Hogwarts, but what Harry saw, no one else seemed to notice; this was only a charade to please his father. He hadn't told anyone but once he had walked down a corridor and accidentally overheard Draco and his father yelling at each other. He had quickly scurried away in fear of being noticed, but he had heard enough to change his view on the boy. He just hoped that Draco wasn't playing him, or that this was some whole prank to humiliate Harry in front of the whole school.

Deep in thought Harry didn't even notice that someone was waving a hand in front of his eyes. Harry stuttered in surprise and looked over at a very confused Ron.

"Hey, you alright? You've been spacing out a lot today, what's up?" Ron said and knitted his brows together, feeling concerned for his best mate. Harry had been a bit off ever since the quidditch game and it was making Ron's stomach churn.

Harry sent Hermione a glance, begging for help. She quickly understood and cleared her throat. Ron turned to look at her and raised his eyebrows in confusion. Hermione looked calm and spoke with a soft but steady voice.

"Harry needs to talk with you about something very important, but let's take it to your room okay?" She smiled and walked through the opening behind the painting, Harry following close. Ron stood there quite dumbfounded. Why didn't Harry tell Ron that he wanted to talk himself?

He followed his friends into the Gryffindor tower and to the dorm. His brows knitted in confusion when he stepped into his room and closed the door behind him. Harry sat down on his bed with Hermione beside him while Ron took a place on his own right across the room.

Harry fiddled with the soft fabric of his blood red sheets and was trying his best to calm down and breath normally. Why was he so afraid? This was Ron, his best friend for years. He wouldn't hurt Harry, right? Ron saw Harry's nervous behavior and the confusion was paired up with worry for the boy right across him. He looked so vulnerable and scared, what was happening?

"Harry please tell me what's going on, you're scaring the hell out of me!" Ron pleaded while shivering. Harry was slowly breathing more calmer and had at least succeeded with stopping the nervous fiddling with the sheets. He built up the courage inside of him and decided that for once in his life he wouldn't be a coward and truly say what he wants. So Harry took a deep breath before lifting his head to meet the blue eyes of his best friend.

"I'm gay," Harry said steadily. After a few very silent seconds Ron's eyes bulged open so much that Harry thought they would pop right of his head. Ron's jaw went slack and he just sat there staring at Harry with the most surprised expression ever. But then slowly turned to another feeling. One that Harry had thought he would never see in his best friends eyes: disgust.

"What did you say?" Ron sneered at Harry. This couldn't be true, his own best friend, gay? Ron didn't know what to think. He felt both betrayed and a bit repelled by Harry's confession. Didn't Harry understand that this was wrong?

Harry slowly felt the tears creeping up in his eyes again. He hung his head and held back the small sob of rejection that tried to escape his lips. This made Hermione act. She quickly stood up and walked over to Ron with heavy and firm steps. The slap echoed throughout the entire room and probably down to the common room. Harry gasped.

"How dare you." Her blank tone shocked Ron. She didn't sound angry, it was worse than that; she sounded ashamed. By now, Harry was crying rivers of tears. His breath was hitching and he felt like he was suffocating. He needed to get out of here, now. Ron was yelling and yelling, words and phrases he never thought he would hear.

"You faggot!"

It echoed around the room. Harry felt lost. Alone. He bolted out the door and down the stairs. When he got down to the common room he saw everyone looking at him. Some with looks of fright, of understanding, of confusion. But Harry was too distraught to pay any attention to them. The only thing on his mind was getting out of there, and that quickly.

He flew down the stairs of the tower. He had to stop two or three times because of the moving stairs. He was numb and broken, but most of all he felt empty. He didn't want to kill himself now. Not after all those failed attempts, not after everything he's been through. He still couldn't understand how Ron had acted. Wasn't he supposed to be Harrys best friend? And the look Ron had gave him sent chills down Harrys back.

Tears still fell from his eyes and rolled down his red and swollen cheeks. His mind didn't pay any attention to anything, all he knew was that he was running. His legs took him wherever they wanted and his brain didn't care. He knew somehow that he shouldn't run away like a coward, he should tackle his problems and stand strong. But he couldn't.

He found himself waking up a bit when he noticed the warmth around him disappear and the air he breathed was cold. His legs stopped moving and his mind focused back on the real world. Harry was out of breath and he hunched over feeling a bit sick. He stumbled towards a big tree and slumped down it's thick trunk. He caught his breath for some minutes and when he could finally breath normally, everything hit him. But he couldn't cry more, he didn't have any tears left. He just brought his knees up and hugged them tight to his chest.

Harry felt so many of different emotions. Anger, sadness, and betrayal towards Ron. Love and gratefulness for Hermione and her undying support for Harry. And most of all, longing for a pair of arms to hold him and never let go.

Harry sat there just thinking for god knows how long when he felt that he had cleared his mind enough for tonight. His limbs were cold and stale when he tried to stand up, which caused him to fall back on his butt. Harry pouted and tried again, this time he succeeded standing up on unsteady legs. He stabilized himself before he went back to the school. He had figured out that he was only a couple of minutes away from Hagrid's little hut so he wasn't far from the school.

When he entered the school again he looked up at a big clock on the wall, stating that it was half past eleven and that it was way past curfew. Silently praying that he wasn't going to get caught, he made his way quickly towards the tower.

The cold stone floor was soothing for his bare feet, he hadn't even noticed that he left without any shoes on. Wondering over when he took them off, he suddenly heard footsteps from the corridor ahead. Harry froze in his path and scanned for a place to hide, to Harrys dismay, there wasn't anything he could hide behind. He decided to stay there and just take the shot that was coming.

Soon enough, a figure emerged from the corner and it stopped when it noticed Harry standing there. Relief filled Harrys body when he saw who it was.

"Hermione," he said appreciatively, almost whispering. The girl rushed forward and captured him in a tight hug. Harry put his arms around her and breathed in the calming flowery scent of his friend.

"God, Harry, where have you been?! We looked all over for you!" She released her grip around Harry and backed up to check him for injuries. Harry chuckled at her mum-like behavior.

"We?" He asked her.

"Yes, at least half the tower snuck out looking for you!" Harry felt genuinely surprised by that, but also a little happy. Then he felt his stomach clench a bit.

"Do… uhm… do they know?" Harry asked his friend that had stopped her frantic search on him. She looked at him with compassion and a glint of guilt.

"Yeah, they know. But not about Draco, only that you're gay. I'm sorry it's my fault, I shouldn't have provoked Ron like that." Harry shook his head but Hermione interrupted him.

"BUT, none of them are against it you know? " She said this with a big smile and Harry couldn't help the massive grin rearranging his features.

Hermione knew that though Ron may have acted like he did, Harry had the entire Gryffindor house watching his back. She had been very happy but really surprised when everyone had gathered up in the common room to help her look for Harry. But, guess that's what being a Gryffindor student means. Not being afraid of anything or anyone. They didn't ask questions which were a huge relief for her but she knew that some of they were going to ask later when it had calmed down a bit.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluff at the end

"Okay, we should head back now before someone catches us here." Hermione said and looked around before she turned on her heels and started walking back to the Gryffindor tower. Harry happily followed her since he didn't want to get caught either, to answer questions as to why they were in the hallways past curfew wasn't anything he would particularly like to do at the moment. Harry was still on edge about the whole tower now knowing why he stormed off like that. Fortunately it didn't seem like any of them was against him being gay. Though he couldn't calm down fully either because he knew that many of them will probably take his crush for Draco as good as Ron did.

Ron.

What is Harry supposed to do with that? Even though he would very much want to he can't just let Ron go with just an apology, that said if he would apologize at all- which didn't seem too likely. This was a bigger problem than most would understand and it's tearing at Harry's heart. He loves his best friend, but is it enough for Harry to fully forgive Ron?

As Harry and Hermione stepped through the doorway leading into the common room, they noticed that a fire warmed the room and hushed voices could be heard. Harry felt his pulse quicken and prepared himself to be bombarded with curious gryffindors. Harry was still not ready to face any questions.

But what surprised him was that there were only three students sitting in the cozy sofas that surrounded the fireplace. Those three were Neville, Seamus and Dean. They were calmly chatting with each other but when Neville noticed Harry he rose from his seat and looked at him with a sympathetic glint in his eyes. Harry simply nodded, as to show him that he understood his concern and was grateful for it. Neville smiled and sat down again, then he waved to them. Harry and Hermione strolled over to the large sofas and took a seat, relishing in the warmth from the fire. Harry closed his eyes for a second, just to calm down. Then he heard Hermione snicker beside him. He turned to look at her and raised one eyebrow as a silent question.

"Seems like you're not the only one dear" She said and gestured towards the sofa where Seamus and Dean were sat. Harry sent them a confused look before he now noticed their linked hands. His eyes flew open in shock and he almost jumped off the couch. Dean grinned while Seamus had a shy smile and rose colored cheeks. Neville chuckled lightly at Harry's reaction and Harry seemed incapable to do anything at the moment except staring and gaping.

"How... when... what?!" Harry didn't know where to start.

"Take it easy Harry, we'll answer what you want. Well to an extent if you get what I mean" Dean smirked at that last thing while Seamus groaned and covered his face in embarrassment. Hermione couldn't help but laugh at it, clearly understanding what Dean was talking about. Even without any real experience Harry too got what he meant and smirked back at Dean.

"Well you can start asking if you want" Seamus said to change the subject a bit. His rose colored cheeks was something Harry had never seen. He always came across as pretty careless and seeing him flustered over his _boyfriends_ words was a new sight of the boy. The word  _boyfriend_ send a shiver down Harry's spine, he hoped that one day he would have someone to call that and be called it in return. Harry shook his head and focused back on the real world.

"Uh well... I guess just how? How long? How did you keep it a secret?" Harry sat up straight and put his hands on his knees, putting his head on his palms.

"Well how long has it been  _darling_?" Seamus scoffed at the nickname but thought about it.

"I think this year is our third one, in June or something." Seamus said calmly with a small smile on his lips.

Wait.

Three years?

?!

"How the bloody hell have you kept it a secret for three years?!" Harry nearly yelled but remembered where they were so he quieted his voice a bit. Hermione sent him a stern look that clearly said to keep it down, he sent one back to say he's sorry.

"It's pretty easy, we're not very popular except Seamus for blowing things up all the time" at this said boy punched Dean lightly at his arm earning a small ouch from him.

"And if we just keep the volume down it's all good to go" Dean said and wiggled his eyebrows. Seamus looked like he wanted to crawl into a hole somewhere and not get up ever again. Hermione tried really hard keeping her laughter down for Seamus sake.

"Okay guys maybe we shouldn't torture him too much" Neville said after being quiet for a long time, but even though he said that you could still see the smirk on his lips. The group laughed together.

Harry was feeling a little bit lighter for every second that passed. He felt like for once in his life he fit in and were just a normal boy living a normal life.

"Okay boys, time for bed" Hermione said with a sigh. Harry only now noticed how tired he felt and how much he wanted to sleep. Everyone agreed and rose from the fluffy sofas, even though all of them probably could just fall asleep right there because they were so comfortable. Harry stretched his arms above him and sighed. This whole situation made Harry's insides churn but he knew that he had people backing him up and especially after tonight. Harry cast a quick glance at the clock, showing that midnight had passed by fifteen minutes. He had school tomorrow, they all had, and would probably not feel very rested in the morning. Harry was about to turn and make his way to his room when he remembered.

He shared room with Ron.

Harry couldn't go back to that room, it was as clear as day. What was he gonna do now? He could sleep on the couch but even so, all his belongings were left in his room. Even though he felt bad, he just hoped that Ron hadn't touched his things or broken them. Thinking like that made Harry feel guilty, it shouldn't but it did. You can't shake your feelings or bonds away over a few hours. Harry and Ron had been friends ever since they first started at Hogwarts eight years ago. You just don't forget about something like that, and it was just that which pained Harry even more when he remembered Ron's foul words against him. He sighed again.

"H-hey, uhm where am I going to sleep? I can't go back to my room" Harry said and fidgeted with his hands.

"Oh right! Harry you can sleep in out room okay? And you will do so until we have solved this in some way." Dean said and smiled at him. Harry felt a little relieved that he suddenly had so many to rely on.

"Thank you, but there's only two beds?" Harry said and arched an eyebrow.

"Yeah but we share Dean's bed anyways so you can sleep in mine." Seamus said and snaked an arm around his boyfriends waist. Harry felt relieved to have people backing him up.

"That's great thank you" He said and smiled a little. Now there was one problem left. He turned to Hermione.

"Hey Mione, can you do me a favor?" She nodded and tilted her head. "- Could you maybe get some things from my room? Like clothes and such?" He asked her.

"Harry just use accio, not to be rude to you but I really do not want to see the bastard either." Hermione sighed and crossed her arm. She frowned and fell into thought for a while. She was probably more angry than anyone right now. Harry was upset and had a hard time understanding what he actually feel at the moment. Hermione and Ron had history and she really had loved him but now she had troubles with feeling anything else but angry. Out of any person in the world, she never thought that Ron would act like that.

"Oh right, I hadn't thought about that." Harry seriously hadn't. There was too much in his head to fit any more. His whole world had turned 180 degrees in some hours. Harry decided that a good night sleep would be what he needed.

After saying goodnight to Hermione the three boys made their way to Seamus and Dean's room. It looked like all the other rooms in Gyffindor tower did. Harry used accio to get his clothes and his most precious belongins. He said goodnight to the two other boys and crawled under the covers. Right before he pulled the curtains around his bed he saw Dean putting his arms around Seamus waist and kissing him sweetly. Harry smiled at this and felt a small pang of jealousy hit his chest. Even so he was immensely happy that he wasn't alone anymore. He was thankful.

* * *

Harry shot up from the bed, making the blankets and covers fall down from his chest. He was hyperventilating and his pulse was running miles every second. Harry held down the scream that wanted to come out, he didn't want to wake the whole tower up again. He tried to recall the dream he had, well more like nightmare, the only picture that he could still remember was everyone he knew and cherished walking away from him. They were leaving him alone, Ron's face was the most prominent one. Harry knew it wasn't real, it was only a dream but he still couldn't fight the feeling that he was utterly alone in the whole world. I mean, if not even your aunt wanted you then who would? Who would want a pathetic boy that couldn't even take care of himself.  _You're weak and disgusting_. Harry heard it, felt it and agreed with it. A tiny little voice in the back of his head tried to scream, tell him that it wasn't true. Harry wanted to believe the tiny voice but couldn't.

With tears rolling down his cheeks he rose from the bed and walked as quietly he could over the wooden floor. Fortunately Seamus and Dean were heavy sleepers, he really didn't want to speak to any of them right now. Harry opened the door and stepped out into the empty hallway. After closing the door he walked down the stairs that led into the common room. He was half expecting half hoping that someone would be the to stop him but it was empty. The only noise coming from the fireplace, just looking at it made Harry a tiny bit relaxed. He continued down the steps, avoiding those which he knew creaked extra bad and got down to the floor. Harry needed to clear his mind, himself knowing that if he continued to push down the tears it would only make it worse. He needed to sit somewhere and cry his eyes out for a second time these past 24 hours.

Harry glanced up at the big clock hanging on the wall. It read 3.14 am. At least he would have a couple of hours before everyone woke up to start a new school day, three of the four houses unaware of the nights happenings. Harry would be lying if he said he wasn't glad that his house accepted him. The next hinder would be if anyone else found out and not being just as accepting. Harry didn't know much about the Wizarding world, except the things he had learned in history class and much less about its view on different sexualities. Harry felt like the muggleborns in the school wouldn't care that much but he wasn't sure how the others would react. It worried him and made him a bit scared too. He didn't want to lose any more people in his life.

Harry sneaked out of the room and whispered the password. He had already set a place where he wanted to go. It was secluded and quiet meaning that he could be alone with his tears. He had been to the astronomy tower some times before when he wanted to be alone. Back then it was his longing for a family that gave him sleepless nights. The first few weeks after the war had been the same, not for a family but for anyone. Just anyone that wanted him because of him, not because he was the chosen one but because of who he actually was. A boy that seemed fated to lose everyone he loved.

Harry had somewhere down the road starting running instead of walking. His bare feet didn't make much sound as they hit the cold stone floor. His body acted on its own, knowing where to go without his brain giving instructions. He had reached the stairs leading up to the tower and sighed before he started making his way up there. He tried counting the steps to calm down but lost track after 37. Harry had stopped crying but tears still remained on his cheeks. He must've looked like a wreck but right now he didn't care. No one would see him anyways. He got up to the last step and took a deep breath. Harry looked up to face the big glass window that showed the night sky. He expected to have his eyes drawn to the sparkling stars dotting the black sky but there was something else that caught his attention. At closer look it was clear that this something was more like 'someone'. As if the universe wasn't messing with him already, of course that someone was Draco Malfoy. Harry felt his body stiffen as the boy turned around, probably hearing Harry breath.

Several emotions flashed through Draco's eyes. First surprise then confusion, amusement, confusion again and right before he stood up fright. It was a look he had never seen on the boys face. He almost looked... like he was gonna cry. Draco had stood up from where he was sitting before and walked towards Harry. He stopped right before Harry so there were about 40 cm in between them. Harry wasn't sure what do feel at the moment. He felt his shields building up, he didn't want anyone to see him now when he was so weak. He felt pathetic, the chosen one can't even stand up to himself and breaks down crying from everything. It was like the world had slowed down, Harry looked down because he didn't want to look Draco in the eyes in fear of what they would show. His posture was slouched and Harry wanted only to become smaller and be able to hide away from everything. It was like Harry could feel the last brick being put in place to complete his wall, the wall he used to shut everyone out. The wall that used to be so strong.

Yet when Draco placed his hand on Harry's cheek it came down like someone blew on a card house. Harry subconsciously leaned into the touch and once again he felt the tears striping his cheeks. His quiet sobs soon turned worse and now his whole body was shaking.

"God dammit" He heard Draco whisper before Harry was pulled into a warm pair of arms. He tried to push away at first, mostly from shock, but when the other wouldn't budge Harry felt his body relax. It was strange, Harry put his head on Draco's shoulder, he could count on his fingers how many times he had let Ron or Hermione come this close to him but now he felt so emotionally drained that he didn't care or even register what he was doing. Harry slowly stopped crying, he was dead tired of crying.

"Harry, you okay?" Draco's voice wasn't stingy as it usually was, it sounded a bit worried. Harry sniffled and nodded, he tried to move his arms to wipe the tears from his cheeks but Draco still didn't loosen up. Harry had calmed down and now emotions started to flood back into his body. He felt his cheeks heat up at the close proximity from to the other boy, the boy he had a huge crush on. Wow was he embarrassed, sure Draco was kinda giving off hints that he liked Harry too but he couldn't be sure right?  _Oh, he called me Harry. He didn't call me Potter like always._

"Uh Mal- I mean Draco, do you mind letting me go?" Harry quietly asked the boy. As much as he liked being in Draco's arms he was also quite embarrassed over the whole situation. He had come here balling his eyes out, looking like a complete mess and now he was being hugged by the Draco Malfoy. His life was getting more confusing for every day that went.

"Oh god" Draco said and sounded like someone had walked up behind him and surprised him. Draco took a few steps back from Harry, you couldn't say he was blushing but there was a hint of red on his cheeks. Harry on the other hand was probably looking like a tomato, if he were to rely on the burning he felt in his cheeks. _Why is he acting so strange?_  Seeing the Draco Malfoy being this distraught was something new. He heard the other boy clear his throat.

"Look, I know very well how bad I have treated you. If you could believe me once in your life it's when I say this. I'm sorry. I have no excuse that would make it all better, I'm just sorry. I bet you hate me." Draco looked down to the floor and wrung his hands together.

"You know, even if you said this before the war and when you still were fighting for Voldemort, I still don't think I could hate you. I will be honest and say that a part of me wanted to but somehow I couldn't really hate anyone, much less you." Harry sighed.

"So, truce?" Draco raised his hand in front of him. It was like Harry was brought back to the past where he once saw the same hand being stretched out to him. This time Harry knew what he wanted.

Harry grabbed Draco's hand.

"Yeah, truce"


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I quite like this chapter

After a hell of a night, morning came and the castle filled with the buzzing sounds of awakening students. It was yet another normal day of different classes, some worrying over homework and some looking forward to learning even more about the magical world. One after the other, people entered the great hall to eat their breakfast and to wish a good morning to their friends and professors. The mornings were usually the most quiet time of day and the light thrum of small talk was nothing more than soothing to Harry.

He was lost in thought, thinking about what had happened during last night. When he woke up this morning, he looked awfully tired and his eyes were red and puffy after all the crying. He had cast a quick glamour spell to look okay before leaving the bathroom this morning. He was very grateful of Dean and Seamus for letting him stay in their room, they were nice enough to tone down the display of affection; even though Harry said it wasn't necessary. Later on, when he went down to the common room he was met with silence as the students observed him. A few seconds later he was bombarded with words of encouragement and even some threats that implied they would hurt anyone who dared to harm Harry. Of course, there was still a small group of people who simply stayed silent. It wasn't uncommon for some to not be fully okay with homosexuality. They didn't say anything, mostly because of the fear of being attacked by the whole Gryffindor tower, but also because they had the dignity to know where they didn't have any right to an opinion.

Harry felt relief and great appreciation for his fellow house mates. It was a feeling of being cared for and protected that he hardly ever came across. Ever since the war, Harry had been feeling more lonely for every day that had past. Of course he had Hermione; he did even have Ron too. But after Fred's death, Ron had been so devastated that Hermione had been glued to his side. Harry understood that Ron needed all the support he could get, but where was the comforting hugs and kisses for Harry? He had no one like that.

A few weeks later he had testified for the Malfoy case. First off was Lucious, and of course, even with Harry's testimony he was still charged with a long sentence in Azkaban. Although Harry had not exactly brought up things that could help Lucius; he really did not have anything to say about the man, except bad things. It was no surprise he got 50 years in Azkaban without any chance of getting out faster. Then there was Narcissa Malfoy. Harry had little experience with her, but even so he could tell with his eyes blindfolded that she was heavily controlled by her husband and Voldemort. He told the court this and they too believed she was fairly innocent regarding the case and she got away with a light sentence. She would go free, but she will be watched and only allowed to travel inside the country. Afterwards she had thanked Harry, almost getting down on her knees to do so.

Finally, Draco. Harry was a bit torn at first; he had bared witness to a lot of terrible things. The worst example being when Draco was assigned to kill Dumbledore. What convinced Harry to testify for Draco was the memory of when he, Hermione, and Ron were caught and brought to the Malfoy manor. There, they had asked Draco to confirm Harry's identity. Even though Hermione's spell made Harry look distorted, it was still obvious that it was him. Still, Draco hadn't confirmed this by saying he didn't know. Harry knew how much the other boy gambled at that moment - for some reason Draco lied to the dark side. It probably saved Harry's life. Even though the Malfoy boy had been at his throat all throughout his years at Hogwarts, Harry still found it very easy to forgive him and look past that. It was around that time when he realized his feelings towards Draco, and at first it came as a surprise. It soon dawned on him that he'd probably had these feelings for much longer than he thought.

Draco, too, came up to thank Harry. For the first time ever they had acted civil towards each other. It made Harry believe that things were going to be better, some day.

Then Harry got his letter from Hogwarts inviting him and several others to an eighth year in the school. There hadn't been much learning last year after all, and Harry had long since neglected his school work. Hermione had somehow been able to cram in some studying by reading several books, but even she had missed a lot. Harry was very happy to go back to the school, even though he had so many horrible memories from the past years. He felt a pang of sadness as he entered the train at the station and saw how few of them there was left. From Gryffindor there was him, Ron and Hermione of course but also Dean, Seamus and Neville. From Hufflepuff was only Hannah Abbott. From Ravenclaw was Padma, Luna and Cho. Harry did not know why only one of the Patil sisters had attended their last year but it was understandable that Parvati felt it was hard to come back.

And last but not least, Slytherin: Blaise, Pansy, Theo, and Draco. Many had directed sour glances at the Slytherins but most were just plain glaring. Harry had not known what to think really. He hadn't forgiven them for what they'd done but he wasn't mad either. Somehow, he couldn't help but pity them; after all, who could actually believe that they had chosen to fight for Voldemort. Harry probably saw what most others refused to see: kids that were scared. Scared of being hurt or hurting others, their parents far away. No one wants to see their mum and dad on the other side of a battlefield.

"Isn't that right Harry?" Hermione's voice cut through his mind and he was suddenly back from his thoughts. He looked around him to see several of his friends looking at him with amused smirks.

"S-sorry what?" He stuttered out, he must have been real deep into thought. Hermione chuckled at him and Dean rolled his eyes with an amused sigh.

"I said, it's nice having someone to back you up." Her smirk had disappeared and was replaced by a bittersweet smile. Harry glanced down the table, at the very end of the long table sat Ron. He seemed to still be pretty mad, his plate empty and his brows furrowed tight. He looked pretty roughed up, dark circles under his eyes and his ginger hair was covered by his hood. It was decided that eight years could wear what they were most comfortable with, not being forced to wear the school robes.

"Don't worry Mione, I'm okay," Harry answered back with his own bittersweet smile as he took a sip of his pumpkin juice. He wasn't. Harry still felt utterly betrayed and crushed by Ron's clear disgust against him. He knew he probably should be more angry but even after all this he still can't hate the one person that's been with him for so long. Harry felt so confused and it was really tiring.

"Hey, let's just forget about him for now. We should go anyways, class starts soon," Seamus said and placed a light hand on Harry's shoulder. He looked over at him and gave a small smile to show his appreciation. He also saw Dean smiling at Seamus with a look filled with so much love. After the couple had come out to Harry and Hermione, he started to notice some small things he hadn't thought of before. For example: the small fleeting touches, love filled looks often shared; it was as if gravity seemed to pull the two together. Harry felt relieved that he wasn't the only one who had this secret. Although everyone in Gryffindor now knew of his sexuality, they still didn't know the biggest and deepest secret: his affection towards Draco Malfoy. It scared him because he didn't know what reaction to expect if someone found out. He sighed and pushed his plate away, a half finished sandwich still left.

"Yeah, let's go," Harry mumbled and stood up from the bench. He cast a quick last glance towards Ron before following his friends out of the great hall. He received several smiles from his fellow Gryffindors and a few giggles from a small group of girls. He smirked and rolled his eyes, at least it was better than glares and whispers behind his back.

The group was a few meters away from the door when it opened and another group of students entered. Four of them, one girl with black straight hair and a tight pokerface. The rest were boys, one of them in particular caught Harry's attention.

Harry stared silently at the boy with bright platinum blonde hair as they walked past. Harry kept walking with his friends but didn't look away from the Slytherin boy. He noticed that Draco didn't wear his school robes either, instead he had on a black button up that fit smugly on his skinny frame and a pair of black jeans to it. It was probably the first time Harry had seen Draco in jeans. Trousers yes but never a pair of muggle jeans. His hair wasn't gelled back as it had been, instead it hung freely and partially covered his forehead. Harry felt his cheeks turn warmer and tore his eyes away from Draco. Even so he couldn't help but glance back at the boy just as they passed. His breath caught in his throat when Draco met his eyes, Draco smirked at him and then he looked away.

Harry felt a smile tug at his lips and he chuckled at himself for being so cliché, like he was some teenage girl in a chick flick.

"Oh Harry..." He heard Seamus's sing-song voice. Harry quickly looked up and saw Dean and Seamus smiling rather mischievous at him. He felt his face grow even warmer and he groaned at his own stupidity. Maybe the other students in the hall hadn't noticed what had happened. Dean laughed at him while Seamus walked up to him and flung an arm around his shoulders. He simply chuckled before speaking.

"You're in deep man," then he laughed too. Harry dragged a hand down his face to hide his clear embarrassment. He heard Hermione snicker behind him and groaned again.

"Not you too!" Harry cried out to her. It only made the whole group laugh at him, except Neville who was utterly confused as to what was going on.


	6. Chapter 6

The day floated past in a blur, it was just class after class and then another one. Harry spent the whole day with either Hermione or the two lovebirds he now shared a room with. Now that he knew about them, it was hard to understand how he'd not seen it before. Neville had also taken it as his job to sit beside him in class during the few classes that he didn't have with Hermione. Harry had come to a conclusion that Neville was actually a very quiet person and it aslo struck him that it was nice having someone backing him up without asking too much questions.

It was during dinner that the group noticed the absence of one particular boy, they hadn't seen Ron in any of their classes or meals. After seeing Harry's pained face at the mention of his former best friend, Dean quickly apologized for bringing it up. Sure it was hard for Harry, he still couldn't believe how Ron had acted, but somehow he also knew he had to get over it. He couldn't sulk around forever, actually scratch that, Harry didn't  _want to_  continue feeling sorry for himself. One might think that after everything he'd been through, Harry had the biggest right to feel that way but he didn't want anyone else or himself to feel like he's some child. He just wanted to move on from the war, instead he was pained by the nightmares, seeing everyone he knew dying and leaving him.

Much to Harry's dismay, Seamus had been teasing him all day long about his secret crush. It still amazed Harry how quick his friend had caught him, he was worse than Hermione when it came to gossip. Dean had mostly left him alone but didn't hesitate to join in when he got a chance, Neville on the other hand was still confused about what was going on but left it a hanging question, thank god, for Harry to answer whenever.

Dinner had ended and the group had split up. Neville had suddenly been dragged away by Luna so fast that he almost tripped over his own feet, she had said something about nargles stealing her wand and ran off with the boy. Hermione had gone up to the common room because she wanted to finish a book she'd been reading for some while. Harry had been left with Dean and Seamus but after talking only for a few minutes he decided to go take a walk outside. He had been cooped up inside all day and needed some air.

Harry had noticed that, after the war he often felt claustrophobic when spending too much time inside the stone castle. More than one time had he sneaked out in the middle of night, either going down to sit by the lake or taking a stroll through the forbidden forest. The forest was not a place of fear anymore, at least not to Harry. When one looked past the rumors and teachers warnings, it was a fairly calm and relaxing place.

He moved quietly through the trees, not paying attention to anything around him and silently hummed on a song he couldn't remember where he had heard it from. The weather was mild, typical for the late summer but it held a promise of colder weather coming. He had no jacket or sweater, only his dark blue t-shirt and a pair of black jeans. Several thoughts floated around in his head but nothing was interesting enough to stick. This was what he needed, some time for himself, not to think but rather the opposite. Just to be able to exist without having the weight of the world on his tired shoulders.

He didn't know how long he had been out but when he got back to the castle he felt a bit lighter and fell asleep without tears for the first time in days.

* * *

The next day started out just as the day before. He woke up, accompanied Mione down to the Great hall, ate some breakfast and chatted with his house mates. Although this morning was disturbed when Headmistress McGonagall left her seat at the High table. A lot of students went silent and watched her as she moved down towards the Gryffindor table. Harry and Hermione were seated further towards the door so by the time she had reached them, the whole hall had paused their eating to watch.

Harry glanced at Hermione but she looked just as confused as he felt. McGonagall came to a stop right in front of Harry and her green eyes didn't reveal anything as to why she was here. Harry quickly got up and straightened his back, although this formality wasn't needed he felt he wanted to as to show her respect.

"Headmistress" Harry greeted her with a nod. She cast him a look and her eyes flicked up and down his body only for a moment before she met his again. Now he was even more confused but he held a straight face.

"Good morning Harry. I would like to speak with you in my office right this moment please." Her words were sharp but in no way spiteful. Harry knew he didn't have much choice and that this was more of a formality than anything else. Now he wasn't just confused but also curious as to what she wanted to talk about. He had a fair guess of what it might be but didn't want to dwell in it too much.

"Yes of course, I take it that you've spoken to my teachers?" McGonagall nodded and explained that he was excused of his first class and forward if this were to take more time. She scrunched her forehead for just a second and something told him that whatever this was, it might be more serious than he thought. The tiny grimace was quickly gone and McGonagall cleared her throat.

"I wouldn't believe anything else so therefore, Miss Granger may accompany you." Harry's straight face fell just a little as he smirked, he nodded and then waited for McGonagall to turn around before looking at Hermione. She had a calculating look on her face but stood up from the bench and followed their Headmistress. Although she stopped just in front of the doors and turned around to face the whole hall.

"Everyone, back to your meal." The once silent student body turned back to their previous conversations and it was as if nothing had happened. The trio turned around and left the Great Hall. Unaware of the grey eyes that never left Harry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooh what's happening?


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're not gonna like me at the end

The duo followed their old professor through the corridors they knew to heart. She didn't say anything so neither did they, although the tension made Harry's heartbeat a little jumpy.

When they reached the entrance to their Headmistress' office, she mumbled the password and the statue swirled as the staircase appeared. Harry couldn't help the fond smile tugging at his lips when he heard the very familiar password. The fact that the now Headmistress McGonagall hadn't changed it said a lot about the respect she still held for the man.

"After me, please." She ordered as she ascended the stairs. Her voice was neutral and didn't give away anything of her intentions.

With a glance at Hermione, to which she smiled back reassuringly, he made his way up to the office. He heard Hermione behind him and took comfort in that he at least wasn't alone.

When they reached the top of the stairs, the door was already opened for them and the Headmistress was about to sit down in her chair. Harry stepped into the room and his eyes instantly searched for the former Headmaster. Once he saw the man in his usual frame, he smiled and nodded to him as a greeting. Dumbledore, probably knowing what this was all about, did the same and kept quiet this time.

Two chairs appeared in front of the big desk within a second where Harry and Hermione both sat down. They looked to their old professor and waited for her to speak. And soon she did.

"I've been made aware of a matter that involves you Harry, which has also created some tension in the Gryffindor house. I'm sure you already know what I'm talking about?" It wasn't as much of a question as it was a statement but he still gave her a nod as response. He couldn't look her in the eyes and so he directed his gaze at the floor instead, finding the old stone very interesting.

Hermione laid her hand on his shoulder in support and beckoned for the Headmistress to continue.

"Before I continue, I would like to add that as your Headmistress it is my responsibility to protect the students in this school from coming to any harm." Her eyes held all of the authority she knew she had.

"Therefore I am appalled as to how you have been treated, if only by a selected few." Her voice took on a softer tone which made Harry raise his head to once again meet her eyes.

"This school welcomes all, and with new people comes new cultures and ways. The wizarding world is still trapped in olden times which oftentimes clashes with the modern, muggle way of life. Even though this is true, doesn't mean it's right or that anyone is entitled to bring harm to anyone." She stated with a firm voice as she rose from her seat. Harry's eyes was still glued to hers and the respect he had for her only grew.

McGonagall strode around her desk so that she stood in front of Harry. Her usually stoic face was smoothed out and replaced with a gentle smile.

"This is your home Harry, it will always be and don't you dare think anything else," She quipped and there was an air of finality of what she said, not that Harry wanted to argue any of it.

"Thank you Professor." Harry gave her a relieved smile and it stretched all the way to his eyes. She gave him a curt nod before she went back to her chair.

"Now, as this matter hasn't affected the whole school yet but certainly will in the future, I want to clear up the obvious dispute between you two specifically and Mr.. Weasley." And with that, Harry felt his heart drop right to the basement floor of the school.

"Profess-," Hermione started but didn't get any further before the Headmistress held up a hand to stop her. Hermione reluctantly gave in, knowing it was no use in arguing with the woman.

"I know it is a sensitive situation, one that I quite frankly didn't foresee. Nevertheless it needs to be handled with, and so I took matters into my own hands."

Harry took in what she said and couldn't help but fear the worst. Would she make him some kind of example? Would he again be nothing more than a symbol for people to poke at and do what they want with.

He thought he was prepared for the worst. Obviously he wasn't.

The Headmistress flicked her wand open the entrance door without a word and Harry turned his head in confusion. He took in a sharp breath as a very familiar red headed woman came in.

Harry didn't know what to feel. Joy because he hadn't seen her for a while? Safe since she is the closest to a mother he has? Or maybe utter fear because if her son could turn on him that quick then what said she couldn't too.

Hermione seemed to be as shocked as he was, assuming by how quiet she was.

Then there was another figure in by the door, and another. The second to arrive was Arthur, he looked perplexed which certainly didn't ease Harry's nerves.

The third person to enter the Headmistress' office was Ron. How someone so familiar could look so much like a stranger, Harry did not know. The boy didn't meet anyone's eyes, instead choosing to stare at his own feet.

"Welcome Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, come in please," the Headmistress gave the door another flick and it closed behind Ron. "And you too Mr. Weasley," She added in his direction.

Ron glanced back at it as it closed, he clearly displayed how little he wanted to be there. Grudgingly he walked over to where his parents stood, though he still didn't raise his eyes from the floor.

Three new chairs appeared in the room, beside Hermione on her right side. Harry felt some peace that at least he didn't have to sit beside any of them. This thought sounded so harsh to his ears but until he knew what they had to say, he couldn't trust them to treat him like usual.

The Weasley family sat down on the chairs provided and the tension was thick in the room. Of course, Professor McGonagall did not care of this.

"I know we're all aware of why I have gathered you here. It is a matter of high importance and I believe it needs to be dealt with accordingly." She put down her wand as she spoke and fixed her eyes on each of them.

Ron huffed and quickly earned himself a smack over his head by Molly. The action gave Harry some hope that maybe it would be okay, although he had been wrong before.

"I will not tolerate this at my school, I've had enough of fighting over fickle things." At this, her voice took on an edge they all knew too well.

"Headmistress," Molly suddenly began. "May I say a few words?" Harry stiffened and prepared for whatever she wanted to say.

"Certainly, Mrs. Weasley." The Headmistress gave a nod at her and sat back in her chair. Her eyes met Harry's for a brief second before turning towards Molly again.

To Harry's chagrin, Molly turned her whole chair so that she could look straight at him. He didn't dare look into her eyes, afraid of what he would see. He kept a steady gaze at the big, dark desk in front of him. Tracing the swirly carvings that adorned the edges and legs. It wasn't enough to keep his mind calm though, as his thoughts were all over the place.

"Harry," Molly's voice was like sunlight breaching the thought pollution in his head. "My boy, please look at me." A hand softly landed on his knee and he instinctively turned his head towards her. He almost broke down then and there when he saw her look. It was the same gentle face, the same loving eyes and the same woman he'd been calling mum for years.

"I don't care. You hear me? I don't care that you like men, quite frankly I've known for some time now," Molly's words voice was calm and steadfast, no trace of doubt. The last part made Harry smile a bit, he thought he'd been hiding it so well.

"I don't care, Arthur doesn't care and you should know that neither does Ron." She concluded. Harry's eyebrows shot up and would have left his face if they could. He turned slightly in his chair to really look at Ron for the first time since he entered the room.

His eyes were still downcast and he sat slouched in his chair, he bounced his leg in a steady pace and he sort of looked nervous. No, not just nervous. There was a hint if shame on him, his furrowed eyebrows didn't match up with the overall pouty expression.

This threw Harry off completely, what happened to make Ron feel guilty? He sure didn't seem to feel it the last time he saw his friend.

"Ron?" Harry tentatively said. The boy winced and crossed his arms over his chest. Harry didn't know what to feel anymore.

"Ron if you don't let go of your bloody pride this moment there is a pensive in this room that could show us perfectly what we talked about last night." Molly's voice took on a sharper edge, the 'mother voice' so to say.

Everyone in the room, except Professor McGonagall, was surprised by the sudden outburst and by the looks of it Ron seemed to make his decision quite fast.

He looked a bit torn, Harry thought. Hermione on the other hand thought he looked incredibly embarrassed, which she hoped would be a good sign. She didn't want Harry to loose his best friend and neither did she herself.

Ron squirmed in his chair before and sighed, he collected himself for a second before speaking.

"Can I talk to you alone?" Ron questioned and looked at his friends. They hadn't expected this but McGonagall quickly interrupted any answer from them.

"If they agree to it then you may, simply cast a Muffliato charm." She stated and looked towards Harry and Hermione.

Hermione turned her eyes to Harry and wordlessly asked if it was okay. He thought about it and even though he felt a bit nervous, he also wanted to hear what Ron had to say. Harry courtly nodded to her as an answer before voicing his agreement to the Headmistress.

"Go ahead then." Professor McGonagall urged.

Hermione casted the charm and at the same time Ron moved his chair closer to the duo. It was awkward and Hermione gave Ron a warning glance when he did. It felt so wrong and strange, to treat Ron this way. Harry put all of his existing hope on that they'd sort it out and everything would go back to normal, at least somewhat.

"Speak." Hermione ordered the boy in front of them. He had his back towards McGonagall's desk.

He wrung his hand before releasing them heavily in his lap.

"Look, I've received a sound scolding for what I did and I guess I was, wrong or you know it wasn't okay for me to behave like that and certainly not towards a friend. Not that it's okay at all to do something like that to anyone else either but I-" The words spilled out in an incomprehensible manner and Harry had to stop him since he'd understood abut half of it.

"Ron! Calm down mate, I can't understand any of what you're saying if you go on like that," Harry said while dragging a hand through his tangled locks.

Ron heaved a heavy sigh and repeated the motion of wringing his hands together. Harry was tired of all this crap and wanted it to be over already, so he decided to just ask.

"Ron, just tell me, I want an honest answer. Why the hell did you react like that?" Harry wasn't angry, nor was he sad. He just felt agitated and tired of feeling so bloody alone.

"Harry I just, I don't know! Maybe I do but at the same time I don't and it makes me so frustrated!" Ron's words hit a special little spot in Harry's brain and suddenly it felt like he might have the answer to all of it.

Ron seemed to be breathing harder and had put his heads in his hands, his leg was bouncing even more vigorously now.

Harry turned towards Hermione with a calm expression, her face was scrunched up in confusion as to why their friend seemed so upset. Harry raised one eyebrow at her, a little bit surprised she hadn't figured it out yet herself. He inclined his head towards Ron and then he patted his own chest. He noticed when it dawned on her, her eyes widened and he almost thought her eyebrows would reach the roof. An amused smirk played on Harry's lips. This was certainly not what he had expected, although he still didn't know for sure.

He quickly glanced at the other people in the room, to his surprise they had all turned around and seemed to hold a quiet conversation. He turned back to the more urgent matter in front of him. Although he didn't really know how to do this smoothly. He decided it might be best to be as straight forward as he could.

"Ron, are you, if it's okay for me to ask... are you gay?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cliffhanger ™


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ron is loved and Harry is so crushing on Draco

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually sat down for once and updated fast but don't get used to it lol
> 
> jk I really love receiving comments so please continue doing so, it motivates me to keep writing!

"Ron, are you, if it's okay for me to ask... are you gay?"

Rons head shot up so fast Harry worried if he'd hurt himself.

"No!" Ron squealed. His eyes were frantically looking between Harry and Hermione. With each second that went by, Rons face reddened and Harry thought he'd hit the nail on what was going on. Yet maybe he hadn't? Before any of them could say anything back Ron spoke again.

"I'm not, I'm not you know, gay." Ron stammered, his voice was down almost to a whisper at the end and his head hung low. Harry was confused but at the same time he felt for him, he was obviously not telling them the whole truth. He didn't want to push his friend but he felt as if this was their chance at making it right again, he wanted his friend back.

"Ron," Hermione leaned forward as she spoke, "Please tell us what you're thinking?" She paused and searched for his eyes under the mop of red hair. She decided to take on another approach.

"Are you familiar with the term bisexual?" Her voice was soft and she tried to convey as much understanding as she possibly could. She too was tired of this fight and wanted him back, with all that it could mean.

Ron stilled, his head lifted a little to meet her eyes and when they did he gave her a tiny nod. She sighed with relief, in his eyes she saw the conflict going on inside him. She wanted to help him so bad, he just needed to let her.

"Please come back to us, we can help you, we want to help you," Hermione pleaded and reached out her hand for him.

He hesitated, looking back and forward from her face to her hand. The conflict inside him seeped out onto the surface and with it, tears spilled from his eyes. Ron took a last glance at Harry before he grasped Hermiones hand. That quick glance held every ounce of his apology in it and with that Harry knew he was way over the whole ordeal.

Ron broke down on the floor in front of them in a messy fit of crying out his feelings while Hermione held him, whispering soothing words in his ear. Harry swiped a tear away from his cheek before joining them on the floor.

It was heartbreaking but at the same time it brought them together again, Harry felt his heart soar of relief and happiness. He knew that what Ron did and said was wrong, maybe he shouldn't forgive him so easily but that's what they did. They made mistakes, they fought, they hurt each other but in the end they did all they could to mend it back together. They were family and they loved each other too much to lose them.

After a long talk with Molly and Arthur, the trio were exhausted beyond measures. Crying really took it of you.

McGonagall had shown gratitude towards Ron and complimented him on his ability to trust his friends, but she had also warned him that if it ever occured again she might not be as tolerable.

He'd paled a little and only nodded at her, which might have been amusing to those watching but McGonagall was not one to underestimate.

They said goodbye to the Weasleys with a promise to visit soon, before the trio left the headmistress office. The tension between them was gone and a familiar quiet settled over them. There wasn't a need for more apologies, Harry knew Ron regretted his actions and for now that was all that mattered. He didn't need the stress that came with constantly worrying if Ron hated him or not. He didn't think so anyways.

It was closer to lunch time already and since they had been excused from their classes they headed directly towards the Great Hall. On their way there they passed some groups of students from various houses. No one really noticed them other than usual, at least students from Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw or Slytherin didn't.

They were just turning the last corner before they could see the door to the Great Hall when they bumped into some Gryffindor students. At first nothing happened then they saw Ron stand behind Harry and in a second Harry was pulled by his hand harshly.

The students, which looked to be 5th years, had formed a sort of wall that closed Harry off from Ron. Even Hermione had been removed from Rons side. They had their wands drawn and pointed at Ron, where he stood gaping like a fish.

Ron had put one hand up in front of him and instinctively taken a step back, the other hand resting at his wand.

One heavy, quiet, tension loaded second went by before it was interrupted.

Harry was on the ground, heaving and almost sobbing because he laughed so hard.

Hermione joined in after she saw him and Ron soon followed. All three of them was gasping for air while the other students stood dumbstruck, not quite knowing what to do.

The commotion had drawn attention from students all around them and while some looked annoyed, other joined in and laughed they too at the sight of The Golden Trio nearly laughing themselves to death on the floor.

The wall of students that had formed in front of Harry quickly dispersed with embarrassed whispers. Once they were gone, the trio tried to calm down and stand up from the hard floor. Let''s just say it took a few times, Harry fell back on his butt several times and each time he laughed even harder and it all created a circle of failing to get up.

When he once again failed to get up there was a voice behind him and it sent a tingle down his spine.

"Center of attention as always, Potter," Dracos voice was like music to his ears and he swooned for a second before he regained focus. He turned his head to look at the boy. He was wearing muggle clothes again, a pair of tight fitting black jeans just as yesterday although these had holes in the knees, and an emerald green sweatshirt. His hair wasn't styled today either and Harry began to wonder what had happened with the boy, the Draco he'd known would never leave his hair down and most certainly wouldn't wear muggle clothes.

Harry was about to answer something snarky when he noticed the smirk on Dracos face. In fact, Harry now noticed the lack of snark in the boy's voice and how he didn't look down on Harry like he'd done years prior. Instead there was a playful aura around him and it clicked in his head that Draco had actually teased him.

This whole revelation made Harrys heart skip more than one beat it felt like, a happiness spread in his body and his grin widened without his permission.

To make the situation even more bizarre, Draco didn't stop walking but instead he came up to Harry and held out his hand.

It was at this moment, Harry knew. His heart had stopped.

It seemed as if the universe had frozen completely still, even though it probably was a mere second. Harry looked Draco in his eyes, those grey ones that he'd thought of oftentimes. Draco in turn cocked a brow at him, as if challenging him. If anything, Harry never said no to a challenge and he smirked at him as he grabbed Dracos hand.

Draco pulled him up to his feet and now they stood only a half arms length away from each other, staring into the others eyes. Harry broke the gaze and took a small step back from Draco as he let his hand fall away. His eyes was once again drawn to the boy's clothes, he chuckled.

"What's up with the muggle clothes, Draco?" Harry smirked at the boy when he purposefully emphasized his name. At this Dracos eyes widened for only a second before his face settled back into a somewhat neutral expression. Though that small second was enough for Harry to know that it affected him, in what seemed in a good way at least.

"Why, I think I look pretty good, don't you Harry?" Draco answered innocently, his smirk though was nothing near that. Harry couldn't help but chuckle at him, mumbling a quiet touché under his breath. Draco seemed to have heard it because a small snicker escaped him. Harry looked up at the sound and a playful grin tugged at his lips.

They were both so lost in each other at that moment so when the giant door to the Great Hall opened, they both jumped a little at the noise. Harry was suddenly very aware of the stares directed at the two of them. Especially the stares of his two friends which stood a few meters away, when he saw them Hermione inclined her head towards the Great Hall. He nodded at her and sighed. He glanced at Draco and gave him a smirk before he started walking away.

He hadn't made it more than a few steps when a hand shot out and stopped him. Harry looked back at Draco with a surprised expression. His touch spread like electricity through Harrys body.

"Put that number to use would you," Draco said before he turned around and walked the other way, away from the Great Hall. His hand had lingered just a second at the tips of Harrys finger before he was gone. The tingling feeling slowly left him, to his dismay since he liked it a lot.

"I don't have a phone," Harry said to him, although he didn't know if he heard it or not. He sighed before he followed his friends into the Great Hall. He just then noticed how hungry he actually was. When he reached his friend he was immediately approached by Ron, who had an exasperated look on his face. Hermione looked amused and patted him on the back before speeding up a little so that she was walking a few steps ahead of them.

"Are. You. Serious?!" Ron whisper-shouted at him while he flailed his arms around. Harry shrugged and gave him a sheepish smile which just made Ron groan tiredly.

"Just, just keep walking," Ron said while pointing towards the Great Hall, "Bloody hell my best mate's crushing on Malfoy," Ron mumbled to himself while rubbing his eyes with one hand.

Harry couldn't help but laugh at him. He put an arm around Rons shoulders and dragged him with into the Great Hall where Hermione already sat and waited for them. Harry sat down across her while Ron took the seat next to her. The food in front of him looked absolutely divine and for the first time in the past months he ate without remorse.

Hermione noticed this and smiled to herself, he'd found something to feel happy about and she was damn well ready to fight anyone that tried to take it away from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!


End file.
